Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Just stop texting and calling.


Because I know you enough to know that when you say you want to talk for the last time or you just want to hang out means everything’s back to normal. It means giving up my right to be mad and giving you another chance to make me feel like crap. It means I can’t bring it up and you don’t have to explain; that I have to forget every kind of hurt I felt and that it’s okay for you to make me look stupid all over again. No sir. No, thank you.

Yeah, I’m okay. I’ll get you out of my system eventually. It’s not like I hadn’t seen it coming. I knew perfectly well that you had a girlfriend. I was stupid for not backing out the first chance I got. It’s just that you made me feel special and I think I have an affinity to guys who make me feel even a tiny bit special. It hurt every time you had to answer her call and you’d say, “hello, babe” or take her call elsewhere just so I won’t hear your conversation but the knowing part was still there. It all hurt just the same. And I’ll probably just forget you or maybe not but I’ll get over you someday. Yeah, one day the vision of you and her won’t recur in my subconscious and if it did happen, it won’t upset me anymore. Not like that September afternoon when I saw you with your girlfriend and my heart couldn’t beat any faster, the next time I see you I will be alright.

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