In this moment, I swear, we are infinite.

I sort of can't wait to watch this movie.

And here is the cover of the book

Walang kwentang lalake ang hindi makapili kung sino ang gusto niya, hindi na dapat dumating sa point na mag-aaway ang babae para sa desisyon niya. Ayoko ng lalakeng feeling gwapo, isang titi, isang babae.

-Sinteya

You say the perfect things, Dr. House.

Heh

I have to detach myself from you and everything and everyone that is remotely reminiscent of you. Your friends, the places we go to, the food we ate, the juice we drank, the activities we did together, the expressions you say. That means our friends (the friends I met through you), the mall, the terminal, your house, your old school, the entire city you live in, McDonald’s, the food we bought using your debit card, Dutchmill and any yogurt product, frisbee, going to the movies, watching Urban Myx, playing at WOF, playing bingo, the words: bangis, mas masarap pa sa first love, pangitun, etc. Oh, and your fuqing cap and those fuqing shoes she gave you and the entirety of your style. And the list goes on but my brain has to stop thinking about you at some point because that’s all it ever does.

I will cry myself to sleep every night how ever long it takes until I get you out of my system completely.

So my baby boy is dressing up as Hourman for a school activity and up until 5 minutes ago I didn't even know who Hourman was. I had to google him to find out that he's a superhero from the DC Comics. I miss you. I know you'll do great and you'll look the best on your Intramurals, which happens to be the day before my birthday. Good luck!

For those of you who don't know Hourman, here is what he looks like

Free wifi from our neighbor! Please have it turned on everyday, every second if possible. Thank you!

One Tree Hill ends. *sobs into hands*

Nathan: It’s the oldest story in the world. One day you’re 17 and planning for someday. And then quietly and without you ever really noticing, someday is today. And then someday is yesterday. And this is your life.

Haley: We spend so much time wanting, pursuing, wishing. But ambition is good. Chasing things with integrity is good. Dreaming…

Brooke: If you had a friend you knew you’d never see again, what would you say? If you could do one last thing for someone you love, what would it be? Say it, do it, don’t wait. Nothing lasts forever.

Mouth: Make a wish and place it in your heart. Anything you want. Everything you want.

Millie: Do you have it? Good. Now believe it can come true.

Quinn: You never know where the next miracle’s gonna come from.

Clay: The next memory. The next smile. The next wish come true.

Chase: But if you believe that it’s right around the corner.

Chris: And you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it. To the certainty of it.

Skills: You might just get the thing you’re wishing for.

Julian: The world is full of magic. You just have to believe in it.

Brooke: So make your wish ... Do you have it?

Nathan: Good. Now believe in it.

Haley: With all your heart.

I think I'm going to cry because seriously this is the ending of my all-time favorite TV series. I remember being a high school student and all the silliness of everything I did and everything that happened to me before and how I forced myself to relate them with scenes from different TV series like OTH and The OC. 9 years, 9 seasons of Brooke and Lucas, Brooke and Chase, Brooke and Felix, Brooke and Chris Keller, Brooke and Lucas again, Brooke and that other guy before Julian, and finally, Brooke and Julian. I'm going to miss you, Brooke Davis.

I cry

I am 106 lbs now. I mean I'm 4'11" to 5 flat tops and I should be skinnier. I know it's still normal BMI but really? I used to be below 100 easy. And I even got around to being 92 lbs- almost underweight. What is happening to me? You have made me fat by feeding me your home-cooked tinapa rice and shrimp and fried chicken and buying me one burger and one chicken sandwich every time we go to the movies and also, eating a lot of the best-tasting isaw ever. It's not all on you, though. It may also have something to do with the in-between review snacks and being present at the Magayon fest and drinking nightly last April or May. Thank goodness I passed the board exam. It would be really awful if I didn't and my parents would be really disappointed and I'd hate to see that happen. Anyway, back to may weight issue, I am going to starve myself until I lose the added 10+ lbs. seeing as I can't even bring myself to use the treadmill that's just sitting upstairs, collecting dust and becoming old. Why am I so lazy? Taking a jog and lifting weights aren't really that hard so why, for the life of me, can I not do them?

GOAL: LOSE THE FUQING POUNDS I GAINED.

Oh hi there, my love. :">

I decided I'm going to let you go.

Alam mo pag lumayo na ‘ko sa’yo panigurado marami akong mamimiss. ‘Yung nakakainsulto mong tawa, ‘yung mga mata mo na halos mawala na sa tuwing ngumingiti ka. ‘Yung pag akbay mo sa’ken, pati na rin ang pag akbay sabay yakap na halos hindi na ‘ko makahinga para lang makahalik ka sa pisngi ko. Mamimiss ko kapag ipinagluluto mo ‘ko tuwing pumupunta ako sa inyo pati ang pagfifrisbee sa dating mong eskwelahan tuwing Linggo. ‘Yung pagyakap mo sa’kin sa pagtulog pati kung paano mo hawakan ang kamay ko. ‘Yung pag ganti mo sa mga suntok at palo ko at kapag umaray ako ay agad kang magsosorry. Maaalala rin pala kita sa tuwing iinom ako ng Dutchmill or kahit anong yogurt drink dahil ‘yun ang lagi nating iniinom kahit hindi trip ng iba. Pag nakakita ako ng lalakeng may suot ng kagaya nung sombrero na lagi mong sinusuot baka habulin ko siya para tanggalin ito sa ulo niya dahil ikaw lang dapat ang may suot ng ganun at kapag nakakita siguro ako ng naka Janoski ay baka tapak tapakan ko pa iyon sa kabitteran. Pero higit sa lahat ang pinakamamimiss ko ay ang pagsorpresa mo sa’kin. ‘Yung feeling na ang alam ko hindi tayo magkakasama sa araw na ‘to tapos bigla ka na lang susulpot  tapos ang saya ko na. Kahit hindi ko sa’yo inaamin at kahit hindi mo nararamdaman, naaappreciate ko ‘yun nang sobra sobra. Parang sa’yo ko naramdaman ‘yung effort na hindi ko naramdaman sa iba. Salamat dahil do’n ha.

Pinipili ko na lang na hindi isipin ang mga kapintasan mo dahil nung nakasama naman kita naging masaya ako. Madami kung tutuosin pero hindi rin naman ako perpekto at huwarang babae at tinanggap mo rin naman ako kahit lagi kang nasasktan at nasusugatan, nasisigawan at nababato ng kung anu ano kapag magkasama tayo. Ganyan ka kakulit at ganito ako ka brutal. Ay, pareho pala tayong brutal. Kailangan ko lang talagang lumayo kasi unfair naman sa girlfriend mo at unfair din naman sa’kin na magkahati kami sa’yo kahit hindi niya alam ‘yon.  Marami pa namang iba diyan, makakahanap pa naman siguro ako ng mag-eeffort  katulad mo pero wala akong kahati. Wala naman akong mahahanap na hihigit sa’yo kase yan ka na e. ‘Yan mismong pagkatao mo , ‘yan ‘yung nagustuhan ko sa’yo . Kaya ‘yang mga sana, wala ‘yan! Kahit anong sabi ko niyan, hindi importante. Alam mo kung ano ang importante? Ikaw. Mahal na nga siguro kita kaya kailangan ko nang itigil ‘to. Wala namang tayo, never naman nagkaro’n ng tayo. Mahal mo ako, mahal mo siya, mahal ka niya. Nauna nga lang siya. Aalis na lang ako sa equation para hindi ka na mahirapan kase sa pag-ibig first come, first served. Walang dapat na nakikisalo.

Early birthday gift. Aaand I'm broke now.

I will buy these later and I hope they still have my size. I have the smallest feet! It gets annoying sometimes.

Tamis ng unang tikim

I've always wanted to get inked. Well, this is the time I finally got around to getting it done. 

Happy. Thank you. More please. :)

Just stop texting and calling.

Because I know you enough to know that when you say you want to talk for the last time or you just want to hang out means everything’s back to normal. It means giving up my right to be mad and giving you another chance to make me feel like crap. It means I can’t bring it up and you don’t have to explain; that I have to forget every kind of hurt I felt and that it’s okay for you to make me look stupid all over again. No sir. No, thank you.

Yeah, I’m okay. I’ll get you out of my system eventually. It’s not like I hadn’t seen it coming. I knew perfectly well that you had a girlfriend. I was stupid for not backing out the first chance I got. It’s just that you made me feel special and I think I have an affinity to guys who make me feel even a tiny bit special. It hurt every time you had to answer her call and you’d say, “hello, babe” or take her call elsewhere just so I won’t hear your conversation but the knowing part was still there. It all hurt just the same. And I’ll probably just forget you or maybe not but I’ll get over you someday. Yeah, one day the vision of you and her won’t recur in my subconscious and if it did happen, it won’t upset me anymore. Not like that September afternoon when I saw you with your girlfriend and my heart couldn’t beat any faster, the next time I see you I will be alright.